Here are 6 common narcissist traits in a husband, along with simple examples of how they might show up in your day-to-day life:
In this context, i refer the person with the narcissist traits as a Husband.
- Grandiosity and Superiority
A person exhibiting this trait believes they are inherently superior to others, uniquely talented, and should only associate with people who are equally “special.” This belief system often requires them to constantly put others down to maintain their elevated status.
Example: When you excitedly share a promotion or a small personal victory, your husband immediately shifts the conversation to a recent success of his own, or comments that your achievement was “lucky” or “not that hard.”
The conversation usually ends there. He will not follow up and certainly not concerned with your success.
What you need to do:
Listen to “his success story” no matter how much you want to continue with yours. You must know that he will not ask further questions about your success so just say Ok or any neutral reply after he finishes his story. Walk away. If he is interested to find out more, he will ask it there and then.
- Need for Excessive Admiration
The man with narcissist traits has an almost insatiable need to be praised, validated, and noticed. Their self-esteem is fragile, and they rely on others—especially their partner—to constantly fuel it.
Example: Your husband becomes visibly upset if he isn’t the primary focus of attention or if you don’t offer immediate, lavish praise for a mundane task he completed.
What you need to do:
If you continue to give praises, he will continue to be the small boy that looks forward to praises. If the tasks are essential daily tasks such as taking out the trash and putting laundry to wash – do you really need to say Thank You and Good Job?! So, just leave him be. Living together means duties are shared with each other right?
- Lack of Empathy
This is one of the most painful traits to live with. Empathy is the ability to understand and share the feelings of another. For a person with narcissist traits, they struggle to truly understand or care about your emotional world unless it directly impacts them.
You cannot blame yourself for this. He doesn’t have the capability to feel pity for everyone not just for you!
Example: You come home in tears after a tough day, and instead of asking how you feel, he immediately asks what you did wrong that led to the bad day, or minimizes your feelings by saying, “It’s not that big of a deal.”
What you need to do:
Stop telling him your sad moments. Stop telling him you’re tired. He does not understand what you feel and he never will. Get help from a family member, part-time maid, a friend or maybe neighour. I repeat. Telling him you’re tired will only make him start saying that he is more tired that you! So, does it matter how tough your day was?
- Sense of Entitlement
This trait is the belief that they deserve special treatment and that the usual rules of life, relationships, and society don’t apply to them. They expect others to automatically comply with their expectations.
This doesn’t just happen at work. At home too. Especially when he is the sole breadwinner or he earns more than you.
Sometimes, he will even say it out loud: I feed and clothe you so you better show me the respect!
Example: He routinely interrupts your important work calls or quiet time, believing that his needs—no matter how trivial—must be met instantly, regardless of your schedule or previous agreements.
What you need to do:
Acknowledge that he’s there and you understood that he needs something to be done. So tell him nicely you need to finish your task first. You can also say the events that could lead to consequences that could occur.
Say sternly but don’t shout, that you need to get that done first and when you’re done, you will do ‘his’ task. Then continue to do whatever you were doing. Even if you’re gossiping with a friend. Who says we can’t have friends?!
Eventually, he will understand that his method of cutting you when you’re in the middle of something, doesn’t work.
- Exploitation and Manipulation
A person with narcissist traits will often use manipulation and exploitation (without guilt) to get what they want. This can be as subtle as emotional coercion or as overt as gaslighting.
Example: When you bring up a genuine concern about something he said or did, he twists the conversation around until you are apologizing to him for causing an argument or for misunderstanding the situation.
What you need to do:
Understand that you are not losing your mind, you haven’t gone insane. Then, you need to know that these people will never apologize! If you really have to bring up a point, do not start with You did this, You said that. He will feel attacked.
Instead, you say I am upset with what you said just now. I am, I am I am. Not You, You, You. Ok?
- Selfish and only think about himself
He has no regards for your time, ambitions and future. They are selfish bunch of people who only think about themselves. So your time, ambitions and future are almost nothing to them. Trust me, he does not think about your dream job, dream house or dream car. He only think of his.
Example: He always explain how he is successful and wants to buy this, buy that. Plan for this, plan for that… blablabla. Notice there is no You, no Us, no kids mentioned?
What you need to do:
Good that you start to realize that his world only has him inside. So girl, you need to create a world that only have you (and your kids). If your kids are still young, no worries. Start small. Start a small business, maybe dropshipping? If your kids have grown, this is the time you need to think of what you love to do and perhaps make money out of it. Sewing? Selling art? Dropshipping? Make beauty products?
Finding Your Peace
If reading through this list felt like looking into a mirror, please remember this truth: You are not alone, and it is not your fault!
Recognizing these patterns is your first massive step toward self-preservation. It doesn’t change the person you are living with, but it empowers you to change how you react and protect your inner world.
This is where your self-care journey begins. It might start by making yourself a cup of coffee and watching K-Drama, or it might mean picking up a paintbrush and using the simple, mindful act of creating art to reconnect with your own voice.
Your peace is precious. You can make art and find peace… within you!
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